That Darned Pain

Well, it seems like the pain might be toning down a bit, but I’m not sure. Today I took about four droppers full of morphine, and still I felt twinges. I wanted to go to the Strawberry Festival that KGGV put on today, its a major event for us and I didn’t even volunteer to help prepare (because I’m feeling sick so much of the time these days) I got up and took a quick walk with Simon this morning. He made the walk short himself, he just turned around and pulled me back home. ‘

I lay around with the computer for a while, around noon I thought I was ready to go to the festival so I walked on down, I made it about a block, I had to lean against the library to compose myself I was in such pain. So I put it off for a while, went back home, lay down, then did some more morphine which did the trick as far as giving me the confidence that I could make it to the festival.

The Strawberry Festival

There was a live broadcast going on which sounded great, very good recordings to whomever set that up. Blues Daddys, Thugz, Peggy Day and the Gypsy Nights, Midnight Ramblers, KGGV All Stars and a trio who were incredibly good and in fact a sextet from someone’s description Greg Hessler I think. And an accordionist who played between sets and was a blast. I made it there at around 4 thirty I think. I shuffled over to the chocolate fountain looking at it lovingly but remembering the mantra “cancer loves sugar” well, that took care of most of the food, but I grabbed myself a few sticks of strawberry kabobs and ate them unadulterated which was fabulous, all organic too, the local health store Food for Humans donated all the strawberrys – thank you Food for Humans. Everyone looked to be having the greatest time, including me even though I did feel twice removed because of the morphine I expect. Got a photo from the Ranger of me holding the reins of some fleeing horses in our Wild West flashback photo stand. I will treasure that.

I spoke to Hunter while I was there. Hunter hosts a show at KGGV about dealing with aids, excellent show. Hunter and I talked about the Mr. Leather contest he attended in Chicago. He came in 23rd in the WORLD. Hunter is 63 but they had the audacity to ask him whether he had a problem communicating with the youngsters out there. What a strange question and it says a lot about the guy asking it. I’m quite sure that Hunter could have spoken to the youngest contestant there about leather alone for 40 mins no problem. Anyway YAY to you Hunter and for speaking out for all 63 y.o.s (how ancient). Spent some time with Robert also at the festival, we talked about the meeting coming up for me – the meeting will be on Monday evening and everyone that wants to be part of the organization to support me who can be there will be there. Robert was telling me that physically he can’t make it, but reassuring me that he will be part of the group. Definitely Robert has been the person in Guerneville that I have been calling when I want someone to do things with. Thanks Robert.

Pain

There it is again, thats how it is with me too . . . sometimes nothing then ouch ouch ouch, sometimes I scream what the heck, stop it stop it stop it. And then it goes away. Or I hope it does, sometimes it stays around for hours on end. It seems like weeks now that I have been dealing with this pain and I don’t like that. I doesn’t sound like gas to me but might be some digestive upset. I was going to ask my doctors about it but I slept through my chemo appointment on Friday (I lay down around ten fortyfive a.m. and woke up around five in the evening) It seems that any day after taking the morphine I am sleepy all the time. I don’t like this as its not healthy but I can’t move around with this pain anyway. I think on Monday I should go to my local general doctor and see if I can get a test for a urinary tract infection or something that might explain whats going on in my insides.

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